"出來"社會工作 (六)～Ａｍｅｎｄｅｄ Ｖｅｒｓｉｏｎ

原來，考驗不斷的出現在我眼前．



沒關係，我一直對自己說．算是自我安撫吧．

之前，有位同業好友，我都習慣性的吐心事給他聽．

但因他已另找謀生去了而沒再聯絡，已漸漸會到以往的作風，就是工作上的喜，怒，哀，樂．．大都自己去承受．但，畢竟事業上的事還是比較盼望可以有個同行的人來訴說一般．

唉．．．無奈的，沒這種機會了．

很想聯絡他，或想像以前那樣的ｓｍｓ訊息給他，至少也會回復一些鼓勵的話，讓我感覺好起來．但如過再跟人家講這些東西，可能會把人悶死囉．



請問ｂｒｏｔｈｅｒ，你的業務，生活都還好嗎？



沒關係，比起以前，覺得自己比較能處理及安置自己的心境了．回頭思考，我反而覺得，一些人生的事，還是始終得要自己坦然的，堅強的去面對，也是必然之事實，笑口常開再重新出發．如友人所說＂明天不一定會更好，但更好的明天一定會到！＂

今晚上，一個人剛剛去了ｃａｆｅ喝咖啡，我的電單車就拍了店舖的隔壁，是很靠近巴剎的地點，剛好那有擺了一箱箱的雞籠，往上面的一個疊接著一個，，裡面都＂囚禁＂著好多的雞．從牠們眼神表露出來，我能感受到慌張，緊張，恐懼的心情．各各看到像我這樣的人類，一定心裡感受到怕的要命．．因為分分鍾，死亡之神就會來勾取牠們的靈魂去的．．．我在想，我每天要面對的，肯定不會比牠們的來的難過，悽慘吧！！！

珍惜眼前的一切．．．．．


待續吧＞＞

China's Web users top 250m on back of disasters, Olympics

China's online population, already the world's largest, has swelled to 253 million, an official report said, driven by news events such as natural disasters and the Beijing Olympics.

The number of Internet surfers in China grew by 56 percent in the year to the end of June, the government-linked China Internet Network Information Centre said in its latest half-yearly report posted on its website Thursday.

Online music, news and instant messaging were the most popular applications, it said.

Readers of online news hit 206 million in the first half of this year, compared with 155 million in the second half of 2007, said the report.

"A series of significant news incidents that took place (meant) more netizens looked for related information on the Internet," it said.

Natural disasters such as snow storms during the Lunar New Year holiday and the earthquake that hit Sichuan province in May were huge news events online, along with news of the Olympics that start on August 8.

People younger than 30 accounted for 69 percent of total Internet users, the report found, adding that 29 percent of users accessed the Internet with mobile phones, reflecting the rapid growth of cellphone subscribers to 601 million at the end of June.

The report said that with 19 percent of the 1.3 billion population accessing the Internet, China lagged the global average of 21 percent.

While the fast-growing online population has made the Internet a new forum for Chinese to express opinions in a manner rarely seen on the strictly government-controlled traditional media, the communist government does attempt to keep tight controls on how it is used.

President Hu Jintao called last year for efforts to "purify" the Internet, and in March the authorities introduced a licensing system in the online video service sector in the latest example of tightened government control.

遺憾是極度.．．當你使別人對你有同樣遺憾的感覺

前陣子，因為自己處理情緒上弄不好，而導致工作及人際關係上出了差錯．

我因此而失去了一個好伙伴，還有我們之間難得建立過的的友誼．

過後的日子，猶如在為自己的所作所為感到煎熬，感到遺憾甚深．

後來，慢慢，慢慢的把自己振作起來了，却昨日聽聞了那位好友因我的挫折而影響了他的業績．．他也在其他朋友面前表明說真的覺得很可恨也很遺憾為甚麼我們之間會落到這種地步．跟讓我覺的不可寬恕自己的是，他仍然還替我覺得可惜，為甚麼本是一位好人好者會踏出錯誤的舉動和決定．．．

當我知道了這狀況後，我整個人感覺猶如心臟被挖掘出來了！！　我不能在面對我自己．．．我竟然讓人家對我徹底失望，遺憾！！！

彌漫的内疚感包圍了我整個身驅，．我真的感覺到極度的遺憾．．因為我使別人對我有同樣遺憾的感覺．．我可真正的感到極度的遺憾，為甚麼我讓別人對我的所作所為感到遺憾．．．．．．

啊！！天呀．那種感覺很哀傷，悲痛．我很渴望能說一千聲，一萬次的　＂對不起＂但這三個字瞬間就很快的在空氣中消失無影無蹤．．永遠沒辦法道出來給對方聽．

INTO THE WILD ~Journey of Christopher Johnson McCandless

"Happiness Real Only When Shared"

That was the final watchword expressed out in this true story-inspired movie. A felt of poignancy as appeared in one of the scenes when the character weakly scribbled them on his book. The movie came near to an ending...

INTO THE WILD is based on the bestselling non-fiction book by Jon Krakauer. It was directed by Sean Penn, who also wrote the screenplay, and stars Emile Hirsch, Jena Malone, Marcia Gay Harden, Vince Vauhgn, William Hurt and Catherine Keener.

As actor and director, most has commented that this is Penn's most fully realized work as a director. He is loved, not least, by Mr. Penn, who has shown himself, in three previous films (“The Indian Runner,” “The Crossing Guard” and “The Pledge”) to be a thoughtful and skilled director. This movie is about Life and death. Remorse and Revenge. Mr. Penn serves as both biographer and traveling companion to this young adventurer, Christopher Johnson McCandless who sets out on a crosscountry drive towards his ultimate goal: to live alone and off the land in Alaska.

Actor, Emile Hirsch performs the character of McCandless heriocally, and I have the same opinion of compliments given by the rest of the commentators.

Personally, its give me a vague realization in a true story of one young man's dream and nightmare. However, being not a frequent movie-goer, anything to do with recounting the subject method on Life journey does lure my attention to go for the movie. .(especially if its relates back to my current life phenomally, oopss).

Another mediatory factor would be the scenic trailblazer characteristic of this movie. For instance, the Alaska scenes depicting the area around the abandoned bus on the Stampede Trail were filmed on the actual site. The production made four separate trips to Alaska to film during different seasons. Try this : watch the tale with your audio devices off (I played my DVD through the laptop, which probably did not support the audio features thus inevitably resulting soundless effect). I bet you will infuse into the scenes, prevailing Christopher's trudge journey to the wild conditions.

To prove it more prominently, Christopher's character managed to illuminate the inexplicable communian to the wild nature. Nevertheless, I feel that it emphasizes his capacity for love, with the grant for fellowshipness, accompanied the ultimate desire yet dire objective pledging for solitude life.

Alas, Christopher it is then too late for him to learn that one must have equal measurement of love and fear with the nature and that happiness is meaningless without someone with whom to share it. As he unintentionally takes the longer route than the direct way, he encounters many unconventional individuals on his itinerary as he purposefully trudges onward to his final destination, arriving in the wilds of Alaska nearly two years after his initial departure.

To the extreme, opined as a spellbinding film, and in condition if you would not grudge enough to spare 2 1/2 hours indulging into the vast wild world [tip : split it to several sessions :) ]. Thumbs up for a movie of memento motives.

"出來"社會工作 (五) ａｍｅｎｄｅｄ ｖｅｒｓｉｏｎ

打工時，出了問題我們身為職員要會懂得處理，但至少還有同事，上司或老板可以承擔．自己創業，故事就完全不一樣了．．一切得靠自己要搞定喔．相信這道理每個人也明瞭．


還有，更現實的話題．．．收入方面是真的，真的依靠自己一手一腳，汗水，努力去拼出的．到了月尾就開始心憂憂的，緊張這月份所努力過的成果能否足夠讓我下個月的開資及生活費．有時真的會產生一點點崩潰的感覺喲．以前看過電視或電影裡的窮家角色，不足夠銀子開飯的那幕，ｎｏ　ｆｅｅｌｉｎｇ，"唉呀．．只是戲劇而已"，但現在看了，我的心抽起一塊唷．．酸溜溜的．．當業績不理想時，戲裡的局面像是拼出了我那時的一個模型，剎那間就略同了我的處境．


再來，因為工作時間比較ｆｌｅｘｉｂｌｅ，所以逗留在家的機會比較多．也自然和媽媽在屋頂下相處的時間就多了．咳．．以前總覺得很多事情會以各人的立場去想，疏忽了媽媽的感受．這一年多的時間，好幾次都因一些事件和媽媽吵鬧了起來！所以媽媽都說我變了，不時也很容易情緒失控，搞成發脾氣．漸漸的才曉得，也體會了為何以往媽媽會有不可理解的反應及動作．原來每個人都期盼有人共鳴的，媽媽也需要這點，而我也渴望身變人的支持！其實，如能退讓一步，那事情的解決方式就會比較妥善．．最主要是我們能夠確保以後不會後悔．只怪以前都一直帶著不理不睬的性格，所造成現在面臨自負的後果．．那不是也在磨練我們要忍氣吞聲嗎？試想如果罵的人不是自各母親，我們可能還會忍受，但只因帶這不珍惜的心態，"利用"了媽媽為"自己人"而動不動就會起埋怨心！！　上個星期，媽媽認不住，開口責罵了我一頓，我忽然之間覺得自己把不快樂及忿怒的心境移轉到身邊人的身上了. 不是因為不服氣，而是察覺到原來自己是那般的愚傭，那般的差勁！！瞬息間，失落的感覺湧上我的胸襟，那天,雙眼正在看著電腦屏幕的我，眼眶裡開始噙著淚水，俳徊等待時機掉落下來，我心裡難過起來．．．從這事項，就知道自己的承擔力有多弱．．所以，要學習控制情緒，和一定要練習盡量把寬容度增加大些！不然，往後要怎能在外頭立足呢？以下這段典故可以則證明了這事實　：


常常以為自己的性格是沒可能有機會得罪人的我，就偏偏給我碰上了．，最近，因為自己的一些作風和性格上處理的不好，把友人都惹生氣了！過後真的覺得失望，因那是我一生的第一次面臨這種挫折，而最後也弄成這分友誼結束了，讓自己甚為懊悔．可惜，時間不能退回．．太遲來做任何補救的舉動．也就這樣感到遺憾．剛好，那時業績上也不如意，所以很洩氣．也許是第一次在人際關係自各搞砸了，所以感到特別內疚，無奈．事情發生的那一天，整整花了好幾個小時在那兒責斥自己，再怎麼認為是一時的疏忽，也只能往自己指責了．要去承受兩種不愉快的事同時間發生，真是把我整個人搞垮了．隔天去爬山運動，我雙腳一路走著，腦子裡還不斷想起，為了這兩件事感到苦惱，感到悲哀，心情沉重的很．我眼睛淚汪汪的，腳步慢騰騰的，很拖著的心情和身軀往前邁步，叢林陪伴這失落的性靈．．．


那這跟我們在社會辦事有何關係呢？其實道理都一樣，這教訓了我不關在語言和處事待人方面要謹慎．試想如果得罪的不是朋友而是我們商業上的顧客，那就糟糕了．人家就沒有理由給我們第二次的信任和機會！幸好的，平時都有多作閱讀勵志類型的書籍習慣，還有已往在佛堂聽過很多正理，就慢慢的我就做了自己的輔導員，鼓勵自己．．然後用了短短兩天來收回心情，再給自己打了振奮劑，重新出發．


Ｓｏｒｒｙ，這帖子像似訴苦比較多，但也是我的心聲之一．．．

（這稿子會出現很多錯誤的字眼．．抱歉）．

ｅｒ．．應該還要待續＞＞

"出來"社會工作 (四)

我覺得這一生中所慶幸的是能夠學會中文.


以一個受英文教育的我，要有今天的程度可算是個奇蹟．不是誇口來讚自己，只因我經歷過，明白那是不容易的事．你可能會覺得這又跟這帖子的ｔｉｔｌｅ有關係嗎？沒直接，或許間接吧．別的不講，單單因此而認識更多朋友已是一種優勢了．


雖為從小學到畢業，都是讀國型學校，但我並不因此而掌握一級棒的英文，哈哈，都是半桶水的呀．．．能夠在這寫寫ｂｌｏｇ也是能感到滿足．尤其是我想寫比較感性的話題或題材，都喜愛用中文來編寫　（部落格裡面的帖子就是好的例子，嘻．．）


感謝上蒼賜予這恩典，讓我在人間的路好走了許多，ｙｅａｈ！


好，言歸正傳．

說實在的, 在這段日子當中除了能讓我深感，處在社會上的一些點點滴滴，也真給我看見了人生的起起落落． 以下的全都是我 “撞板”的經驗，就當作警惕自己吧，望能使以後多注意．．.


就說自己好了，從小到出來工作，有很多事情我都在逃避，不想去面對．在我打工時的日子，要面對的事與人並肩而顯現在我眼前，但現在回想起，我能扯就扯就，很多事情就這麼過了．所以，問題及困境來了，說真的，並沒有好好去處理，不實際去解決．


我還很記得，當我就讀小學時，到了要上學校的時間，曾經幾次都躲在房間裡偷偷哭起來，因為覺得不願意去面對外界的人（同學們）　！！很奇怪的小孩，對嗎？就這樣嘍．．比較懂事的年齡，照樣那麼的不喜歡處理事務．．一直很依賴我爸爸和大哥．父親的突然離去就猶如棒子在我頭上這麼一擊，打醒了我．．．＂醒覺＂後的我，真是感受到又恐懼又凌亂．


從此，我給自己說，要勇敢站起來的時候了．我對自己許下承諾, 不能再這樣下去．與其等到以後發生狀況而感到悲哀，倒不如現在來開始好好去學面對人生的挑戰吧．


自己出來＂闖＂的日子，我開始要面對以往我不成真真看待的處境，一一呈現了．


待續>>

【和尚与屠夫】

从前有一个和尚跟一个屠夫是好朋友。

和尚天天早上要起来念经，而屠夫天天要起来杀猪。

为了不耽误他们早上的工作，是他们约定早上互相叫对方起床。

多年以后，和尚与屠夫相继去世了。屠夫去上天堂了，而和尚却下地狱了。

Why? 因为屠夫天天作善事，叫和尚起来念经，相反地，和尚天天叫屠夫起来杀生……

小哲理： 你做的东西是不是都是你认为对的，却不一定是对的。

Bukit Orang... secret hiking place in Kepong

It's considered scarce to have place to find leisure in hiking any hill around the whole Klang Valley area..

For myself, i'm lucky to have one small hill nearby my resident.

I go there twice, add on to thrice if possible every week. Not bad, no a reserve forest though, and day by day it is facing threats of being scraped off to flat ground, a nature sacrification to make way for the gradual housing development in the nearby area..

And the name of the hill? Bukit Monkey. Haha, it's named by the communities there. The folks said many monkeys inhabilit there. And it's true-lah.

And I was eager to take them some photos, and that particular day, i told one of my acquintainces from the MSN chatbox that hopefully I would manage to carry my camera and take a few snaps.

Personally, I reckon it's supposingly to be named Bukit Orang. Why? Simple, coz from the eyes of these long-tailed creatures, they are as astonished as you are to see so many monkeys, and vice-versa. Hehe. Imagining them having capability of uttering words, they will put a question mark of why so many human-beings visited the hill every days, several round daily....haha! So, these dearly 'homo'sapiens might spontaneously answer you the name of the hill as Buki Orang, if you would to query in front of them. lollll..

Almost around 5:45pm will be the dinning time, and everyone will gather round near the entrance before you proceed to the man-made staircases up the hill....

Tadaa..... below are the masterpieces... Hey, I quoted out some of the dialogues by these mammals (huh.. dun asked why... unbelievably, I was granted the super power of understanding their language !! Alas, this miracle ceased once I reached home, and such sacred force never befall on me anymore, not in my later life either, of course.

"...rock-a-baby, oh my little baby..."

"Why am I here? Huh! Following my lord, he's the donor and supplier for the
gorillas' dinner.. S@##, why do I not receive such good treat from my lord?? I
jealous loh, with these gorrilas!!"

"..Grrr....I'll be back, for more fruits, grrr..."

Oh, no no, dun be mistaken, the tree doesn't speak.. This is our Malaysia's property, Getah De Pokok.


Still got rubber collector meh, nowadays?? Poor little tree, dunno which 'Antie' dropping her big signature on it?

"... Huh..huh... yayaya.. papaya, need more VitB12 to cure my thyroid.. huh huh...."

This cap belonged to a Japanese soldier who lost his way in the then jungle
during WW II.

"And, I'm the winner of the day...!!!! Got the biggest pack-of-the-day dinner for myself, yeah."

"Eh... dun try to snatch it from me, ah.. "









End liao.... :)

GM shares plunge on bankruptcy fears

The company faces so many problems, a Merrill Lynch analyst says, that bankruptcy isn't out of the question. Here's why it also may be unlikely.

The plunge is an astonishing moment in the history of the nation's largest automaker -- once so powerful that many people believed that, as the late GM president Charles Wilson was incorrectly quoted as saying in 1953: "What's good for General Motors is good for the country."

GM's slump helped the Dow Jones industrials fall nearly 167 points today and the overall stock market dip into bear-market territory after crude oil hit a new closing high of $143.57, up $2.60 from Tuesday.

Merrill Lynch analyst John Murphy said GM needed to raise up to $15 billion in new capital to get through 2008 and 2009. The company insisted it had enough to cash to get through 2008 and could sell assets and make other moves in 2009.

GM closed down 15.1% to $9.98. Shares of all automakers plus automobile parts makers and tire makers also fell.

Bankruptcy is "not impossible" if the U.S. auto market continues to slump, Murphy wrote. A GM bankruptcy would put all labor contracts at risk and take years to resolve and could cause problems for thousands of suppliers.

IS GM too big?There was extreme skepticism that bankruptcy would ever happen. The company is too big and important to the domestic economy, and investors, management and, ultimately, the federal government would probably get involved first.

GM has about 280,000 employees worldwide, with 140,000 in the United States.
Murphy cut GM to "underperform" from "buy" and lowered his price target for the largest U.S. automaker to $7 a share.

He also lowered his forecast for 2008 U.S. industrywide light vehicle sales for the third time this year and said the recent drastic decline in sales would likely to continue through 2009. He expects 14.3 million U.S. auto sales this year and 14 million units for next year, down from 16.15 million units in 2007.

Murphy lauded GM's vast restructuring strides but said three factors have combined to dwarf the company's best efforts:
GM needs for more capital to cope with slumping sales. Every drop of 1 million units in U.S. auto sales on an annualized basis means a loss of $3 billion in revenue for GM. "The financing necessary for the next two years is likely to be larger and more expensive than recognized," he wrote.

Weak sales will continue through 2009. The industry faces "a more severe downturn than even the most bearish industry observers expected," he wrote. Murphy lowered his earlier target of 14.8 million light vehicle sales in 2008 by half a million units.

GM's sport-utility-vehicle segment is on the verge of becoming obsolete, eating away at the company's profit potential, he said.

On Tuesday, GM surprised investors with a June sales report that wasn't nearly as bad as feared and sparked a dramatic recovery for the U.S. stock market. The stock was up more than 15% at one point before fading to a 2.3% gain.

Reported in US on July2, 2008

"出來"社會工作 (三)

呼…..無可否認 ， 這猶如人生的賭局 ! 自己很明白, 這可能是賭了大些．可是，也因為不想永遠都過著一樣的身活，做著一樣的循環性的工作，所以就下了這不太可能回轉的賭局　（說到有如不歸路似的）．


我一生當中，只（特別注重，哈哈）換了三分工作．很奇妙的，也只有這最後一次是不帶著依依不捨心情離開的（別笑我儍啦，這麼忠實的職員，ｍａｎａ　ｍａｕ　ｃａｒｉ？絕種囉．．），而是憧憬著展望光明的未來！！　唬．．．好刺激喔（後來真的夠繽紛色彩，而且對我來說．．．果然刺激，一下（ｍａｌａｙｓｉａ　ｓｔｙｌｅ　ｏｆ‘蠻’的意思，哈！）

以下是我希望和大家分享的一點點的心聲回響．．


ｅｒ．．先待續，好嗎？別罵人啦．．刺激的東西是要充分準備來寫才可以囉．



ｓｏ，待續haa．．　：）